So I'm un-with it
Okay, it’s time for a “This proves that I’m not only old and crotchety, but also totally un-with it” column.
• To start off: I am completely convinced, without a shadow of a doubt, that my life will continue unchanged even if there isn’t a National Basketball Association season this year.
I’ll go even further. If I never see another professional basketball game, I doubt my life will be affected in any way.
As of the 2010-11 basketball season, the least amount that any player could make in the NBA, according to one source, was almost half a million bucks. I don’t know about you, but I could live on that. The average salary was over $3 million, according to the same source. I could retire after one year on that.
I’m sick and tired of people who make that much, squabbling over more. The owners and players can all take a flying leap.
• While we’re at it, if I never heard the name, “Kardashian,” again, I believe my life would continue to perk along just fine. As one who believes that the term, “reality television” is an oxymoron, anyway, I can’t believe people are so enthralled. Reality TV is the least real thing on TV. An earthquake in Turkey, winter storms in New England, an airline disaster avoided – those are real, and the people going through those things are real.
• Can we go on without hearing any more about Janet Jackson’s infamous “wardrobe malfunction?” Is that going to be with us forever?
It happened at half-time in the Super Bowl. In 2004, yet. By the time the next Super Bowl gets here, that will be seven years. But there are still court proceedings over who’s fault it was and who should be fined. A federal appeals court just let CBS off the hook.
Look, unless you’re going to have a five-second delay on everything, occasionally something strange is going to happen. Even with the delay it might happen. Like many people, I wasn’t even sure of what I saw until the next day when it hit the fan.
I didn’t much care then, and I don’t much care now. And I doubt many children were corrupted.
• I’d also like to stop hearing about the “Supercommittee” of congressmen that’s supposed to solve all our fiscal problems. We all know they’re not gonna.
So does that mean that $1.2 trillion in automatic cuts will actually take place in 2013? You’re kidding, right? It will all be amended or rewritten or re-appropriated or something.
Think I’m kidding? Wait until some of those lunkheads realize, “Hey, if those cuts go into effect, Grandma’s probably going to move in with us, along with my mother in law, Uncle Zeke and that nitwit cousin.”
It may not be all of those, but once our fearless leaders realize that what they’ve done to us, they’ve also done to themselves, there’ll be some changes made. So forget about them until it’s crunch time, and I don’t mean the so-called deadline.
• At last, Halloween is over, so I don’t have to look at masks and Christmas ornaments at the same time when I go shopping. I saw one person with a double armload of Halloween goodies at half price. I jokingly asked if he was going to save them for next year. He said he was going to freeze them. I think he was kidding. I think.
(EDITOR’S NOTE: David Nichol’s column appears in the Times-Herald on Thursdays. Nichol is a member of the Times-Herald news team. He can be reached by e-mail at firstname.lastname@example.org.)